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A solo woman's retirement manifesto

3/6/2023

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It's important to have guiding principles in life. Otherwise why do we do the things that we do? I know that a lot of people survive on this earth living on the "life escalator" (and the "relationship escalator") which really doesn't require you to have guiding principles. As long as you stay on the escalator, it gently takes you along and you do the things in life mostly "because that's what adults do". Which is a trend I like to buck with this blog. Today I write my own retirement manifesto, so I can check in with myself on my "why" when faced with difficult decisions and to make sure I've not gone off track with my purpose.
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The evolution of my relationship with money

2/20/2023

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Last year after talking to a friend about FIRE, she said something that struck me "I didn't grow up in a household with aspirations". Dazed and confused, I realized that I didn't either. So I wanted to see "how did I bumble along through life and eventually stumble into my current financial independence trajectory?". Let's look back together with both a money lense, and a motivations/values lense.
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My 4 FIRE turbo boosters

2/6/2023

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I have always lived a relatively frugal life. I grew up on the border of poverty and suffered through my house burning down as a child. Some of us learn that possessions mean nothing when we've lost them all. But I was heading along the "escalator of life" certainly making financial choices because "that's what adults do". Until I discovered the FIRE movement in 2021 and my world was turned upside down. Here are my 4 success factors that have put me on the track to reach financial independence 5 years from now at the age of 43. And they do not include giving up avocado toast (love).
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2022 in Numbers

1/23/2023

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I keep a lot of spreadsheets to track my income, expenses, savings, investments, wealth, and more. Here is my first time sharing the breakdown of how 2022 went for me on my journey towards financial independence. I will also share some backwards looking charts to show where I've come from. My savings rate dropped significantly in 2022 because my tax rate went through the roof. But even though my savings rate as a percentage dropped, it was my highest contribution year in terms of actual dollars.
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Italy relocation costs breakdown

1/9/2023

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In 2021 I re-evaluated my life through my FIRE-lense and realized that I needed to move back closer to the mountains to do my favorite hobby: hiking. I made a short list of countries in Europe with good hiking. I narrowed that list to countries with a self-employment visa/residence permit. Lastly, I narrowed that list down to countries I could save money (e.g. cost of living, and taxes). Italy ticked all the boxes. It took about 1 year of bureaucracy but I'm finally here, and now I share with you the breakdown of the €14,000 total expenses to make this happen (and how I will recoup that in 1 year).
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Entrepreneurship isn't for me

12/26/2022

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Back in 2020, I had an idea for an innovative travel app. I was so energized by this new business idea that I was seriously contemplating dropping $30K of my savings into paying developers to build it. Then a friend recommended that I go through an incubator, which is a program that helps entrepreneurs "incubate" their idea. Most people will never complete these programs because they don't have a viable idea that will make money. I dropped out 1/3 of the way through for mental health reasons, fully intending to restart at a later date. But after reflecting on everything I had learned, I took away the most important lesson possible....
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Even if we love our jobs, we still need FIRE

12/12/2022

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I've heard it said that if you love your job then you never need to worry about retirement or financial independence. Or that the FIRE movement is a symptom of people hating their jobs more than anything else. I've been noodling on this for the last 12 months and still arrive at the same answer: financial independence gives the future versions of myself a platform from which to take flight.
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Transfer up to €100K for a flat fee of €3

11/22/2022

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I cannot contain my excitement at sharing my new discovery with you: a new payment disrupter called Atlantic Money targeting the exchange and transfer of money cross border for large value transactions. Wise and Revolut really cover the small value market but their fees increase as the transaction value rises which makes their service far less attractive. Sold your house in Berlin and now need to move €100,000 to your US bank account for low cost? You can do that for €3 with Atlantic Money. Read on to find out my review.
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Monthly budgets won't change your life, and why I don't have one

11/14/2022

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For a long time, I thought one of the most obvious financial health tools was to have a budget. I even told my friends they should have a budget. And then one day I realized... "I don't have a budget". My immediate thought was to make a budget, because we all know you need one, rather than stopping and asking myself "but do I need one?". In this blog I lay out why I don't have one and what I use in its place.
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Tax danger of buying non-US real estate as a US taxpayer

10/15/2022

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I hate alarmist content, but my friend is F**KED. Like, $87,000 of taxable income fucked with no money to pay the 32% tax. Many subscribers of FI/RE dream of moving out of the US (if that is their place of origin) to save money in retirement. Dropping money on a home in their new country of residence could be a dream come true. Until so-called "phantom foreign currency income" taxes whack you over the head with a baseball bat. Read on for the dangers of buying real estate outside of the US so you can discuss with your tax advisor BEFORE you buy.
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My list of financial mistakes

9/19/2022

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I've made mistakes. I've made sub-optimal choices. But they were always based on the information that I had at the time of the decision. Here I've made a short form list which I'll add to as I keep learning on my journey. Drop in the comments any item you want to hear more about in it's own blog post, so hopefully you can make more informed decisions on your own journey.
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ADHD and the To-Do List for my To-Do List

9/5/2022

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If you have ADHD, you know the vicious cycle called "The To-Do List For My To-Do List". Keeping track of our thoughts can be chaotic and so overwhelming that we completely shut down and end up doing nothing at all. Each person and their experience is unique, but today I'm sharing two tools I am successfully using to manage my life and thoughts. Read on to learn what works for me, and a bit about what doesn't work.
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A solo person's guide to dying in a digital world

8/22/2022

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On top of doing FI/RE solo, I'm also a serial migrant. This creates more complexity than a digital nomad, as I move to a country for 2-3 year periods where I become a local taxpayer, open local utilities/bills, and create local assets (like buying a house or pension investments). I'm the only one that knows what I have and how to access it. Though planning for my own death may seem morbid, having organized an up-to-date treasure map for my beneficiaries means that they can spend more time on grieving their loss and less time being buried in hunting down my recurring bills and assets. They'll remember me fondly rather than cursing me and my missing paperwork. Read on for how I set this up.
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Buying vs renting housing: which is the better financial choice? A case study

8/8/2022

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Since discovering the FIRE movement I've been intensely studying the myth and cult of homeownership. This concept is also tied up in societal noise that if you are renting then you are throwing your money away. Or that you haven't reached adulthood if you are still renting. I wanted to find out in a case study if renting could give you the financial upper hand over buying. I took 7.5 years of records owning my house and renting it out once it was no longer my primary residence. Read on to see the numbers.
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Why I don't take financial advice from my friends: Part 1

7/25/2022

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There are very few things I can definitively tell my friends “you should do that thing” when it comes to money, and vice versa them to me. I was recently asked by a two different friends: “Should I buy iBonds? 7-10% interest is really good!”. I started laying out all of the different questions I asked myself to determine if those iBonds are appropriate for my situation. I shared the thought process with my friends. When a friend says you should do something specific with your money, you don't directly know their circumstances that led to that decision being the right one for them. In many cases “7-10% interest is really good" was the only reason (and it's not a good enough reason for me). I will use this blog to walk through specific money decisions I might need to make, the questions I ask, how the answers map to a decision, and the opportunity costs of one option over another. If you've ever asked yourself “Should I....?” about a money decision, I hope this exercise gives you some more direction for your own situation.
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Price cuts: should I sell my house during a recession or wait for recovery? A case study

7/11/2022

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I am not an economist. I cannot predict if we have entered or will enter a recession. But it's hard to ignore the news talking about it (I call it "noise"). Recently I have been approached by a friend who is considered selling their house in order to "take the money and run". So the question became: with the tides turning, mortgage interest rates rising, demand dropping, supply rising, and price cuts increasing, should they hold off on selling the house until the economy turns around? Read on to learn my case study response from the 2008 recession.
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Geo-arbitrage and US social security pitfalls

6/6/2022

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Though many people don't believe that social security payments will be around when they retire, other financial experts disagree. Achieving FIRE with geo-arbitrage is a very attractive proposition, but there are some pitfalls that can cause you to miss out on free money in the event that social security is still around by the time you become eligible. Read on for the details and planning opportunities. 
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How to know if you're spending frivolously

5/23/2022

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News flash: I hate the word frivolous. Why? Because it's a judgement on how someone has spent their money. Shame is shown to be ineffective at changing money behaviors and can actually lead to financial disengagement instead (the opposite of what we want!). Imagine telling your wife "you spend too much money on clothes, we have to spend less to save for retirement!" and expecting that to inspire her to cut spending. Let's explore what tools you can use instead to assess your own spending habits, or to assess spending habits together with a partner.
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Origin story of the name The Aspiring Adult

5/9/2022

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Aspiring Adults are unfinished. The finished state, or so we are told, is "adulthood". But what is adulthood? Who ever truly reaches it? Of the broad 4 phases of human life, adulthood is the only one that has markers of having reached it (or... not if that's the case). I decided to take that rule book and throw it in the trash because “human beings are a work in progress that mistakenly think they are finished”. This is a favorite quote of mine by Dan Gilbert, in reference to his research and talks on the psychology of our future self. The Aspiring Adult is a blog for sharing ways to reach financial independence by dispelling the myths of adulthood and the shame of having never reached it.

From the myth of the homeownership dream to the myth of mid-life crises, read on to explore the origin story of this blog and it's name.
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I'm an accountant and work the evening shift. Here are the benefits.

4/25/2022

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I was diagnosed with ADHD in November 2021. It is very common for adults to be diagnosed with ADHD but this will trigger the question, "why didn't you know sooner?" I worked in an office my whole career and had built up a toolkit of coping mechanisms around me without even realizing it. I dreaded waking up every morning, dragging myself out of bed 10 minutes before I needed to leave, and frequently arriving late to work. The possible shame of missing a meeting or email was the only motivator to get me to wake up. I started a fully remote consulting role in November 2021 and working with people in the US while being in Europe meant I needed to accommodate the US hours during the fire-hose that is joining a new role. I thought that working the evening meetings would be temporary. And then I discovered that I prefer working the evening shift. Below I outline what I learned and how I make it work for me.
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